We sometimes find ourselves in situations, paths and/or relationships that do not serve us well. For Eastern Cape singer, Seer, her follow up single ‘Frozen’ is the realization of this toxicity.
Growing up in the small town of Kambi, 32-year-old Seer has always wanted to be a professional singer. She was inspired by commercial vocalists such as Whitney Houston, Celine Deon and Maria Carey. On the spiritual front, there was strong influence from the likes of Cece Winans, Kirk Franklin and Hillsong.
Seer wanted to be more than just a beautiful voice. She wanted her music to make a difference, to touch the lives of its listeners and to help people navigate this crazy world.
When listening to her newest single ‘Frozen’, it’s evident that her music does exactly that.
In describing the track, she says, “I think a lot of people will relate to the song because a lot of us have had a toxic relationship with someone or something. ‘Frozen’ is about letting go of all the comforting lies that we tell ourselves to avoid the pain that comes with the truth. It’s the courage to face that truth head on. The quality of our lives is a direct result of the decisions we make and the decisions made by those who came before us. What we choose today sets off the dominos for tomorrow, for those connected to us and those to follow. ”
Seer’s message is an important one. If we are to free ourselves of past pain and mistakes, we need to acknowledge what was done to us, or take responsibility for our own actions.
She adds, “For those who are still in it, I hope this song gives them the courage to let go.”
Wanting to share some of the principles she has learnt in her journey, Seer shares six tips to maintain a toxic free environment.
1. TELL THE TRUTH
According to Conversations with God by Neale Donald Walsch, there are five different levels of truth telling.
1. Tell the truth to yourself about yourself
2. Tell the truth to yourself about another
3. Tell the truth about yourself to another
4. Tell the truth about another to that other
5. Tell the truth to everyone about everything
To sum this up, Seer says: “Say what you mean, mean what you say. But don’t say it mean. This is not easy to practice and I’d be lying if I said I’m all the way there. But I’m a witness that the more we fall in love with the truth; the less we attach ourselves to toxic environments and situations.”
2. SEEK UNDERSTANDING
“As humans, we’re so protective of ourselves that we’re often very defensive in conversations and relationships in general. This robs us of the opportunity of understanding the other person and without understanding, we can never relate. Therefore whatever we’re doing will always be toxic because each one is looking out for themselves. If we seek to understand people and situations, we are empowered to make informed decisions on how we are going to relate, if at all.”
3. BE KIND
“Seriously, it won’t kill you. If you are kind to people, they will be kind to you. And those that aren’t won’t stick around for long, STAND YOUR GROUND.”
4. BE QUICK TO FORGIVE
“Forgive yourself and forgive others. The quicker you forgive, the less you hold onto toxic energy. Toxic energy breeds and attracts toxic energy. Remove it from yourself as quickly as possible because the longer you hold on, the harder it is to let it go. Allow love to rule you. Love breeds love and love attracts love.”
5. APOLOGIZE
“Acknowledging you’re wrong and expressing an apology verbally doesn’t make you weak, it means you’re mature enough to face yourself. Sometimes, you’re the toxic one in a situation.”
6. ACCEPT THAT YOU DON’T HAVE IT ALL FIGURED OUT AND ALLOW GOD TO UNFOLD THE MOMENT
“We often hold onto plans that aren’t working out, relationships that have served their purpose because we’re so desperate to have our plans and decisions work out the way we imagine. Perhaps, how it unfolded is all it was meant to be. Perhaps it will unfold differently in another chapter of your life. You don’t know. And that’s OK. The best practice for me is to allow God to lead me.”
‘Frozen’ was co-written with producer Gino Lee at River Road Records. The two took a very casual approach to writing, which adds to the overall song’s dynamic.
